Oh an I almost for got...

This is Lali's bloggie. She advertised me, so I gotta return it.

I gots mad love gor that girl. ^_^

go kill everyone at work and take the day off..

That was a line from a Beatnuts song. Shit had me rolling cuz I was at work and looking around like fuck this place. My job is beginning to piss me off. See, I work hourly vs. commission, meaning that whichever one pays me more, is what I get paid. For instance, I put in 32 hours in a week, that's about 200 somethin' a week, give or take with taxes and all. But I don't always get those hours, my schedule varies. Which means that I am almost FORCED to make my money off commission. Which means I have to talk to people and sell these fucking tours and shit. Man it's pretty stressful and I'm probably not making any sense, but a nigga gotta vent too. Maybe my paychecks would seem bigger if I didn't have to pay 100 dollars a week. 50 to my mom for rent and 50 to her boyfriend for bailing me out. 

Speaking of.. I got court on Friday for that shit. Wish me luck. They told Stylistics that he had one of two options. Option 1 was too spend a year in county, suspend his driver's license for 6 months, and pay like a bajillion dollars in fines. Option 2 was a probation like program for a year. She said option 2 was him getting off easy. I figure if they do that to me, option 2 won't hurt me at all. I still have another year of juvenile probation left anyway. Then again, if this never happened, I probably would have been off of that already. Oh yeah, it can also hurt me financially. And I just realized that now EVERY job can see that I have a record. Wow, I always knew becoming an adult would suck, but not this hard.

Me and my epiphany having ass. WTF? Anyway, here's something I realized about myself. And possibly other people. Well in all honesty, each and every one of us can control our emotions. Well most of em', but I'll get to that in a second. See, whenever we think something, our mind sends out messages to our body and conscience. So if you have that feeling of "I'm a bad person" or "I'm ugly" or somethin' like that, it's because you thought about it and kept thinkin it to the point where you started to believe it. That's where depression and self consciousness comes in. You start criticizing yourself and the mind tells you it's true. However, if you tell yourself "I'm a good person" and "I am beautiful", then those are the mind waves you can control. But if you do that with alot of things, you can control most emotion. It ain't lyin' to yourself because you know whats true and what isn't, but instead you think it in your head so the emotion of that bad event doesn't affect you. Cuz sometimes, you can't let your emotions affect your decisions, depending on what type of emotion it is. Now the ones that you CAN'T control are the ones that usually have some deep significance. Like for instance, I can't control this feeling I have for this one girl. So I know it's a strong feeling I got for her. But the thing I've realized I can't get over is the fuckin' concussion to the head that these bastuhdz left me with. Niggas is STILL goin' around talkin' shit. But wow, how the rage has been eating me up inside. In order to get what I am bout to say, you have to understand my past. Ever since I was a lil dude at 13, I was out and about doin' this and that. The reason I got the name Skit was because at times, I would do shit without thinkin' of it. I would react pretty wild sometimes. One time I was smoking on the block and someone let off a firecracker and without thinkin of it, I ran cuz I thought it was the cops. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. Then my boy Will started crackin' on me. He called me Skitso, cuz I was acting real paranoid, then the name stuck. Skit. SkitSoFrenic. Well, back to my undying rage. It's a rage that has been buildin up over time. I don't wanna let that rage control me cuz I'd just be goin' back to my old ways. And look where my old ways got me, right? So how do I suppress this anger? I smoke. When I smoke, I'm the type that just mellows out. I'm on point, but my body is relaxed, my mind is relaxed, my entire state of being is relaxed. I don't take my rage out on others. It's not an excuse to smoke, cuz if it was, it would be a really poor excuse. It's just my only escape. Ahh. I need help. Where's Amy when you need her?

I will be going to Common and N.E.R.D.'s concerto with bloggie fan numero uno. I will be gettin them tickets by the middle of next month. Ya'll should peep it too. Well those of my readers that are in Florida. lol

Peep it. Made me laugh.

Peace, Love, and Nappiness. AHAAA...

"..Niggaz frontin' like they real.. But busting caps ain't got a mothafuckin' thing to do wit showin' skill.."

(Only people that's in it like that know where I'm comin from with that.)

OOOLLLLLDDDD SCHOOOLLLLL KIIIIIDDD

Davy D, you are the best, rock this beat cuz it is so fresh!!

Now that the love isss gooonee!!!

Uhh been a lil unoccupied. How my week has been going so far?

Got my first paycheck. They told me they were gunna mail it but didn't tell me I had it the whole time. O.o Spent some cash. Gave half of it to my moms for rent. ^_^ (lame) lol But now she can't say I don't give when I got. Cuz soon I ain't gunna have shit. Nah my next paycheck is coming this Friday and after that they come in big. Cuz that was just training pay. Pfft Imma eat me a nice meal at mickey D's. Maybe probably smoke a fat one. Hey I've earned it now. I'm advertising Disney tickets on them forums I'm on!! LOL But yeah comin home after work and chillin'. Stopped the forums a lil. I only go on there cuz I'm a moderator for an audio battle league. It's pretty nice. One dude said some sick shit. His name was Faceman.. That wasn't his name but his user name is -_-, so we call him Faceman. lol

"Your just a waste of space like an asteroid belt."

Get it? Waste of space=waist of space=asteroid belt. Nice. Lol

 

Well yeah. Alot of people wanna do things with me this weekend but I think I wanna go see my baby sis Amy and my number one bloggie fan. =]

An by the way. Since I'm in a techno kind of mood lately. lol Here's this..

days go by and still i think of you.

Once again, you gotta watch the whole video. There's a story to it. Daft Punk sampled off of this and made an animated video using clips from the animated movie "Interstella 5555". It has the same concept except it was a girl in the guys place. Daft Punk made other videos with clips from the same movie, linking them all together somehow. But I really love this song. It's Dirty Vegas if you don't know the artist. I really hope I don't lose the one I love. I can't say I love someone. Certain women make it hard for me to do that. The rest are 'emotionally unavailable', while my heart lies at vacant. 

Message to my number one bloggie fan. Don't worry about how things are going. Your young, you have your whole life ahead of you with a lot more hardships to encounter. Don't mean to sound cynical, just ain't gunna lie to ya. Remember, it's like I said, if he really loves you, he will show it, if not, it could be a good thing. At this age, it is probably more healthy not to focus on love. Your a beautiful, smart, and charming person. I'm sure things will work out for the best. I hope the dryest of eyes for you. Skit cares.

Speakin' of. I hope to show girls that I want a serious relationships and that I am serious and blablabla. I know I am not the first guy to tell you this and that, I am the first guy to mean it though. Bleh. Lali's blog gives me alot of insight on stuff. I mean, I ended up askin myself the same question though. How do I prove it??? How do I show a girl how I feel and that those feelings are real? That I want to treat her the best I possibly can. How do I get just a simple phone call? Or a chance to break the ice? When is it that I can make a move? I've told you what's on my mind. Mostly you. I may not say things directly, but I deliver the message. I'm scared to approach because wounded hearts tend to feel cornered and bite back. I've tried to heal a broken heart before but it ended up bleeding worse and the only fault I had in it was failing to save her from her past haunting her. So instead, I drop hints. I know you've received the message, you just haven't replied. I know it isn't the best time for you so I will just keep lingerin' around and hope for you to respond.

if you could see it then you'd understand..

Topic: Bodyless souls

(Listenin' to Daft Punk - Around The World)

Dragging empty sacks of spirits in satan's graveyard

Slappin tempting packs of cigarettes, traits behave charred

Saint's belay war's, reaper can take only so many souls

Awake lonely proes, freindly foes, N Make phony woe, sense these tolls

Hence these holes in my heart signify despair, Since thy part dignified repairs

Rinse my art, is it my affairs? Hints I'm smart, isn't thy prepared?

It isn't why they care, rather the sake of having faith

Fathom the stakes of spazzing fates, Hasn't the hate been grabbing pates?

Askin.. the way sins happen straight, tells me the questions are irrelevant 

Yellin the lessons are intelligent, yet oppressions scars the residence

So when obsessions are ignored, aggressions are implored

Now depressions are aboard, so expressions jar in hordes

and possessions aren't gored.. We leak the tears of sorrow

to see the cheers we borrow to defeat the fears of morrow

These ruined corpse need souls, seeing we would be otiose beings

the music sounds better with you.

Wow. Yesterday was finally a good day for me. One of the best I ever had. I will start off by saying this. The first thing I did was prayed. Haven't done it in a while, but I woke up, got in the shower, put my hands together, didn't kneel, and started praying. I don't know exactly who I was praying to, but I know I asked them for an opportunity to change. I asked him/her/it to help me get through this day for I have now realized my wrongs. My wrongs being my actions that only mess up my own life. See, the main reason I prayed was because I was scared I was going to get drug tested by my job. They don't require us to take a drug test!! So someone was with me yesterday. Question is, 'Who?'.

I took a break in the middle of this to spark an L. I even backspaced this so I can capitalize L. And I also came to the conclusion of Fuck a psychiatrist! but I don't remember why. I constructed a punch from it. 

"Your chances are fucking crazy like lady luck boned a psychiatrist."

So yeah my day continued. I finished orientation and now I start training tomorrow. But when I get out, I go find another job. So I said yeah I gotta celebrate. Friggin great. I felt so good. Today was ok. My first day off. My job site was moving so they told me I didn't have to go today. 

Shit. Been doing alot of thinking. I'm starting to get on my shit. Been a lil too busy for a blog.

Here's some of the shit that has caught my interest recently. 

This video is something you really have to observe. It's beautiful. Every single person moves along to a different part of the beat. I look at this song as an image of the world and people. Everyone contributes their own distinct sound to the beat of life. I know that sounds corny, but that's what I have gathered from this video. This has to be something you watch, not something you just look at for 2 seconds and say,"Oh that's nice." I mean the video is pretty old but I want people to see it the way I see it. This was pure genius.

Simplicity

By Snale
The most complex emotion with in me.
Some people see it as weakness,
I see it as a way of life.

Tell me what you see'
I'm sure you've looked around at the world
But have you ever really opened your eyes?
Tell me what you see'

When a man is in the park
Throwing breadcrumbs to a flock of pigeons
Do you see happiness? Joy? Fufillment?
Or just a flock of pigeon'

When a tree sits through the winter
With one leaf holding strong
Do you see solitude? Strength? Independence
or do see it for what it is.

To you anyway.

My lifes made up of the most complex simplicity
I see with my heart, not with my eyes
I draw pictures of life in my head
and it all starts with something so simple....

Do you see the hurt in the man's eyes
Or will today just be another walk in the park
ask yourself
To just see life for what it is
just for a second
Simplicity

I can't take credit for this one, but I must admit I loved it. It was by a dude on them forums. It was intended to be a poem, not a verse. But it is something that makes you think. We tend to complicate things, when everything is much more simpler than it seems. Live life and enjoy it. It's the latter of the two that people have problems with. The amount of time we spend on this earth is so insignificant and small that we need to cherish it. Because in the blink of an eye it will be gone. The simplicity of life: you live, then you die. The End.

I gotta get mine, You gotta get yours..

Sorry I haven't blogged in years. I'll be back soon. Been hella busy. I start working my FIRST job on Monday and I'm still seeing about my second job. Most probably will be Pollo Tropical.

Here's something for your enjoyment.

Skit out.