Although it seems heaven sent, we ain't ready to have a black president..

Well well well.. I've run into you again my listener with no ears. I have alot to say this time. Things have beeen runnin through my mind that have made me want to check myself in to a mental institute. Well first off, I am officially a registered voter. Now I'm still kind of borderline on who I am going to vote for even though it is one day away. I was thinkin Obama but now he is talking about taxing small businesses which will directly effect me because I work for a small business. I do like the fact that he is going to take people off welfare and bring them into jobs but if he is taxing small businesses, he will have less jobs to put them in. Oh and I dont know what Bush is trying to do before he goes, but he finnally is doing something. Gas went down at least two bucks in the past month. It's amazing. I'm still gonna personally help Bush pack his shit, but touche George. Thing is.. Mcain wants to keep Bush's shit going, and as far as oil it's an ok thing but economically we are waaaay too fucked for it. Which is why I am still leaning towards Obama. He also wants to tax those who make more than 250k a year 50%. Which is not messing me up but the upper class will be feeling it. Still though, If I was making half of that I would not give two fucks. Now I see why the rappers and celebrities support him so much. Share the wealth. In a wierd way, it kinda makes me feel like a communist for agreeing with that. W/e.




In other news, I moved out my mom's house. I moved in with roomates into a 5 bedroom house. My ex is living with me and I would have loved it to be on a relationship status but I can't. She's changed and I dont like what she's become. Reminds me of me when I was younger and that life got me nowhere but shot at, beat up, or in jail. She used to be the one that told me to stop smokin cigs and weed. Now she's always buggin me for one. That's the ugly side of change, I guess.




Now you might be thinkin, "This guy seems to be doing good. What in the blue hell is driving him so crazy in the head?" Well interestingly enough, I was reading Maria's bloggie (http://mariabonita09.blogspot.com) and she talked about how people always focus on money and that's what's important to them. I'mm sitting there like, "Girl if you only knew." This economy must be bending over for the white house cuz they've fucked it. I jave two jobs and I only get about 1400 a month. Ladies and gents, let's go to math class a gain. After taxes it's about 1200. 400 goes to rent. The first light bill hasn't come and I have to split that between five people. 50 to probation A. 30 to probation B. 25 to court costs. 60 to phone bill. which leaves me at like 500 something maybe 600 to play with for the month. Now, I don't have a car so I gotta take public transportation. 4 dollars a day. Times 30. And then I gotta eat. Lord knows how much I spend on that. And then I have unfortunately become a heavy smoker. I go through a pack a day. Well anyway, there's more expenses that I haven't even calculated, but you pretty much get the picture. What have I done to solve my problem? Started pushing reef. There is nooooooooo reef on the pavement. There's a bigger drought than Lil Wayne mixtapes. I get a zip and I double my profit in two fuckin nights. So I pretty much maintain two jobs to be flat broke. My ex is supposed to start her job tommorrow so maybe that will make things better cuz then rent is only 200 a month. The money I make from green, I save up in a savings account. Now this isn't what scares me. I was warned that this is life after high school and especially without a high school diploma. What scares me is this. Every day I got to work in the morning, Get out at 3 and go to work again at 5 to come out at 10, 11, even 12. for 12 to 14 hours a day, I am workin. And then i come home and sleep. I'm trapped in the system already and I am only 18. I cant ask my mom for help cuz she is broke her damn self. She just moved into a new house so that can really fuck with someone's money. Still, I can't believe I have turn into a "zombie". I say zombie cuz of Nas's song "Black Zombies". I used to listen to it and think to myself, :I don't wanna be a zombie. Now I listen to it and I feel like he's talkin bout me. Listen to it. You'll see what I mean. I then realized that I am a young mahfucka. I have seen what I have become early in my life and still have time to change this. First step is highschool diploma. NOT ged. HSD mofos.




Oh and I know it's mad late but the concert was pretty bangin. The first band was lame. N.E.R.D. pissed me off. Common was the shit of course. Two moments that stood out for me. First was when he performed "The People". The beat dropped at "Can't leave rap alone, the game needs me!" He performed that shit pretty nice. He is actually pretty awesome on stage. Then he started performing a song which the beat sounded awfully familiar to Nas' "New York State of Mind". And I'm like hmm. Then I heard,

Rappers I monkey flip em

With the funky rythm

I be kickin, musician inflict the composition of pain

I'm like scarface sniffin cocaine

Holdin an M-16

See with the pen I'm extreme

Bullet holes left in my peep holes

I'm suited up with street clothes

Hand me a 9 and I'll defeat foes

Ya'll know my steelo, with or without the air play

I keep some E & J sittin bent up in the stairway

Or either on the corner bettin Grants with the cee lo champs

Laughin at baseheads tryin to sell some broken amps

G packs get off quick, forever niggas talk shit

Reminiscing about the last time the task force flipped

Niggas be runnin through the block shootin

Time to start the revolution, catch a body, head for Houston

Once they caught us off guard, the mac 10 was in the grass and

I ran like a cheetah with thoughts of an assassin

Pick the mac up, told brothers, "back up," the mac spit

Lead was hittin niggaz one ran, I made him backflip

Heard a few chicks scream, my arm shook, couldn't look

Gave another squeeze, heard it click yo, my shit is stuck

Try to cock it, it wouldn't shoot now I'm in danger

Finally pulled it back and saw three bullets caught up in the chamber

So now I'm jetting to the building lobby

and it was filled with children probably couldn't see as high as I be

(So whatchu sayin?) It's like the game ain't the same

Got younger niggaz pullin the triggers bringing fame to they name

and claim some corners, crews without guns are goners

In broad daylight, stickup kids, they run up on us

Fo'-fives and gauges, macs in fact

Same niggaz'll catch a back to back, snatchin yo' cracks in black

There was a snitch on the block gettin niggaz knocked

So hold your stash until the coke price drop

I know this crackhead, who said she gotta smoke nice rock

And if it's good she'll bring ya customers in measuring pots, but yo

You gotta slide on a vacation

Inside information keeps large niggaz erasin and they wives basin

It drops deep as it does in my breath

I never sleep, cause sleep is the cousin of death

Beyond the walls of intelligence, life is defined

I think of crime when I'm in a New York state of mind

I also met a really good customer there. Everyone was pullin out L's. So I pulled out mines. Advertisement baby. Some girl saw what I had and said that she absolutely had to get my number. I saw a big dollar sign over her forehead.

Money doesn't buy happiness, but neither does being broke.

Well, let's see what happens tommorrow.